It's his birthday today.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEIogIfncbc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LU9lnmUHSUE

Oh, How his music makes me happy. Happy Birthday, Neil!!

HE'S BACK.....

And he is looking mighty fine.

Random thoughts and what nots.....

1. Yesterday I got a hepatitis b shot and it hurt like a mother. I am still sore.

2. My brain hurts from reading Gertrude Stein's "Tender Buttons". That lady has some odd things going on in her head.

3. My professor has braces. I think it's kind of cute.

4. At work, we passed out surveys for our parents to fill out. I read one and she said, "the last few years have been amazing. I am not having the same feelings this year." It kind of hurt to read that. I am really trying. Promise.

5. Why am I not on good terms with exercising anymore? We were once such good friends. I gotta get back on track.

6. One of my good friends is getting induced on Sunday. I am super excited. This will help to redeem January. A new little life to celebrate.

7. Why do I feel like the older I get the more socially retarded I become? Oh bother.

8. I saw "Leap Year" last week. It was fantastic and the leading man was yumalicious.

9. My New Year's resolution is to see more movies in the theater. I think this is one resolution that I may actually keep.

10. My other resolution is to go on a few dates. This may not be so easy :)

11. I got to hold the cutest Asian baby ever. I think the parents were a bit worried that I was going to kidnap him, but I wasn't. I just wanted to squish him. He was so stinkin' cute.

12. I hope that my little sister is doing ok. I am still sad for her.

13. The Ogden Standard Examiner wrote a really nice article about my brother in law. If I can ever figure how to post it, I just might.

14. One of the things that makes me the happiest: when my students get off the bus and they see me and yell, "Megan, you're back!" That just makes my day. I love those kids.

15. I really heart Saturdays!

I'll be seeing you......

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIGO6mQnLjQ


Today marks 10 years since my beautiful mom passed away. I can't wait to see her again.

xoxox

(my mom loved Liberace and he sang this song at the end of each show.)

With one final deep breath, my brother in law left this life. He was surrounded by family that had been by his side for many hours helping to make the end of this journey a pleasant one. I was touched as his mom lowered herself to his ear and tenderly whispered, "Todd, thank you for letting me be your mom." How could I not let the tears flow? I have had to bury both of my parents, but I can't imagine what it must be like to bury a child or a husband. That is what tears me up the most. Todd is now free from the pains and the stresses of mortal life. I hope that he is running around and enjoying his new surroundings. I think that should be allowed for a bit. I hope that he gets to meet my mom and dad.

My regret is that I didn't allow myself to get to know him better. I feel saddend that I let it pass me by. I marvel at all the love people had for him and I feel bad that I didn't know him as well. I hope someday that I will get the chance.

I am extremely grateful for my faith in an afterlife. I know that this life is not all there is. I know that death is just part of our eternal progression and brings us one step closer to our heavenly home. It still doesn't mean that the seperation between this life and then next doesn't cause us to feel deep sorrow or grief. I think that's natural. We know that they get to live on, but we just don't get to interact with them as we once did.

I am deeply touched by those that have reached out to me and offered love and support. I am touched by friends of my little sister who stayed at the hospital day in and day out. That is love.

I was honored to be allowed to be there while Todd was going through the process of dying.

To my baby sis: I love you.

And so it goes....

Life is tough. There seems to be no way to slice it or dice it. It is not supposed to be easy, but sometimes it just seems downright unfair. My brother in law was found unresponsive and was life flighted to the University Hospital. He has lots of problems...brain damage, heart damage, liver damage, not breathing on his own etc. It's sad to walk into his room and see all the tubes coming out of everywhere. It makes me tear up every time. I have spent many hours waiting and hoping and praying for something, but for now it's just waiting. And more waiting. I can't imagine what my sister or his family must be feeling. This has got to be tough for a mother to see her son in such a state. My heart goes out to them.

However, there are a few things that I have learned. There is this amazing strength that comes to those who are taking care of loved ones. They truly learn to forget themselves and serve others. It isn't about what they want, but what is best for the person in need. I am amazed, also, at how much people are there to offer up support and comfort. I have been impressed as many co-workers and friends have come to see him...maybe for the last time.

The other thing is that I love the Priesthood. I can't imagine my life without it. I am so grateful to the gentleman and his nephew, who were there to visit this gentleman's dying brother, who graciously and without hesitation offered to give a blessing. It was beautiful and sweet and very sincere. It was very much appreciated. It brought peace and comfort to those of us in attendance. Thank you!

I am not quite sure how to end this post. I will just say that I am grateful to my friends that I have asked to pray for him. They don't know him, but they have still be willing and have also been concerned. I have received many texts asking for updates and many phones calls. It really means so much to me.